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Pardon Our Dust – Setbacks

Updated: Dec 6, 2021

Dear Friend,

As noted earlier in this series, I grossly under-estimated the time required to successfully complete the remodeling of our master bathroom. What I thought would take 4 weeks turned into 4 months, much to the dismay of my very patient wife! Part of the delay was due to a number of unplanned setbacks. Despite my fear of failure, I forged on with the project. Though some fears never materialized, I did encounter other challenges that impeded my progress. Among the major factors that extended my estimated completion time were fatigue, distractions, and impatience. Read on to see how the many setbacks I faced affected my attitude and overall outlook. Blessings, Verdun Woods The Thriving Marriage Coach

Fatigue Major home improvement projects are not for the faint of heart. Unlike a sprint that requires a short-term burst of energy and a quick start, these efforts are more like a marathon, requiring stamina and endurance over a long-term. Experienced runners recognize the major differences involved in both preparation, conditioning and pacing necessary to successfully run and complete a marathon race. Vince Lombardi, the legendary coach of the Green Bay Packers (whose name is also inscribed in the Super Bowl Championship Trophy) had a famous quote concerning the importance of conditioning. Lombardi said: “Fatigue makes cowards of us all.” In essence, when we are tired and fatigued our energy is low and we’re not up for the battle. Under these conditions, we’re easily tempted to run rather than stand and fight. Sometimes I pushed myself to the point of exhaustion, working as independent consultant by day then transitioning to evening and weekend warrior by night. While I felt it was the responsible thing to do, failing to pace myself took a toll on my overall quality of life. It also produced some unintended outcomes. Distractions When I’m tired, I lose focus. When I lose focus, I don’t pay close attention to details. And failing to pay attention to important details demanded by certain tasks, such as measuring, cutting, wiring or painting, can lead to costly mistakes. Unless I’m willing to compromise safety or quality, these mistakes can often require re-work, which delays completion of a project. In addition to fatigue, other distractions contributed to my extended timeline. Many of these “diversions” were good things that involved family travel, hosting out-of-town guests, birthdays, graduations and welcoming new grandbabies. But in the midst of my massive and, at times, all-consuming project, they often disrupted the cadence of my efforts, causing me to lose focus. Impatience This project that began as a labor of love was starting to feel like forced labor without much love. As the time dragged on, I grew increasingly frustrated over my slow progress and missed deadlines. My wife, who had retreated to the guest bedroom to avoid the dust and fumes (and the sight of the toilet sitting in front of the bathroom door), was also growing weary by my inability to commit to a firm date of completion. My growing frustration and impatience contributed to a major lapse in judgment, which produced a costly mistake that almost ruined the project. More about this in tomorrow’s segment, subtitled “Losing Heart.” Hard Work and Heart Work Like major home improvement projects, marriage is not for the faint of heart. It’s a walk of faith. And just as running a marathon, it requires preparation, conditioning, and endurance. When couples recognize their need for “home” improvements, many aren’t prepared to face the setbacks they encounter along the way. In my virtual course, A Marriage that T.H.R.I.V.E.S., I help couples learn how to endure the “hard” work while allowing God to do the “heart” work in their lives. CLICK HERE to schedule your FREE 30-minute preview (a $75.00 value) to see how you can build a thriving marriage that leaves a lasting legacy.

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